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by heidi seaborn



I would like to say something to the woman

I’ve known since I was that red-haired girl.

I only borrowed this smile for the day. I know

it’s a little worn, torn at the seams. You see, I

hardly know what to do with myself, but lipstick helps.

Paint my mouth like a bed of zinnias—orange,

hot pink, fire red & pretend I’m summer.

I’ll invite everyone I know over and we’ll jump

in the pool, splash around in my blue eyes.

In a blink, we are all smoking cigarettes behind

the vending machine & dropping dimes for soda pops.

I have a sinking feeling that this moment

is already gone where the extinct

animals go to get catalogued, a flash

in the pan like the Aerocar or the hydrogen bomb

or gold nail polish. All that glimmers is what

keeps me up at night. But last night was a blur.

Isn’t it always that way when you wake up and look

in the mirror at who you were yesterday?

Some days, it’s best to stay in bed way past

when the robins have gone.

Previously published as "Selfie with Marilyn" as a video performance at: :




Heidi Seaborn is Executive Editor of The Adroit Journal and author of the award-winning collection Give a Girl Chaos (C&R Press/Mastodon Books, 2019) and two chapbooks. Since Heidi started writing in 2016, she’s won or been shortlisted for over two dozen awards and her poetry has appeared in numerous journals and anthologies such as American Poetry Journal, Frontier, Greensboro Review, The Missouri Review, Mississippi Review, Penn Review, and Tar River. She recently received her MFA in Poetry from NYU.

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